Daughter panics and blames her dad to get out of jury duty, it works: ‘I walked out of that courthouse like I just dropped the hottest mixtape of the year.'

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  • A few years ago, I got called in for jury duty. You know the drill: long lines, awkward silence, everyone pretending to read a book they brought just to look responsible.
  • They finally called my number and ushered me into a courtroom. I was nervous, but mostly just bored and hungry. The judge starts the whole "do you have any reasons you can't serve" thing, and people start raising hands.
  • One guy says he's self- employed. Another says he has a kid with no childcare. Then it's my turn. I didn't have a reason, but I raised my hand anyway, mostly out of panic.
  • The judge looks at me and says, "Yes, ma'am?" And I blurted out, "I live with my dad and he has a peanut butter allergy." A beat of silence. She says, "And?"
  • I froze. Why did I say that? Where was I even going with it? Everyone turned to look at me. So I committed. I go, "If I'm not home to remind him to check labels, he'll forget and di.
  • It's happened before. He bought peanut M&Ms thinking they were safe. He thinks natural peanut butter isn't real peanut butter." The judge just blinked. Then said, "...you're excused."
  • I walked out of that courthouse like I just dropped the hottest mixtape of the year. Told my dad what I said when I got home. His only response?
  • "Wait. I can't have peanut M&Ms?"
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  • Upbeat Monitor1488 Hahaha! Perfect! You were right! Wise_Holiday602 OP Right?? I had no idea where I was going with it, but somehow it worked out sometimes. Guess chaos is a strategy
  • tennisgoddess1 Just wear a T-shirt that says, "guilty" and don't raise your hand. When you get asked questions, just say that if they are in court it's because they obviously did something wrong- therefore guilty. Sound nuts, illogical and no one wants you on the jury.

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